top of page
  • Writer's picturealexadoman

Happiness is inside out

I have a question, when it comes to what makes you happy. What does make you happy?

Have a quick think. I invite you to think of 7 things that make you happy, GO!

I’m happy to share what was on my list (in no particular order);

  1. Sunshine

  2. More money (that I’ve earnt from my successful Coaching business)

  3. More holidays

  4. Cocktails (in the sunshine)

  5. My family

  6. My relationships

  7. And finally seeing Harry Styles live (was supposed to see him on my birthday in 2019)

But if you take a step back from your list, similar to my list, is there a connection? And is the connection that all of these factors are external?


During the pandemic we had to face a life where those external things to some degree were taken away. But the hope that we would once again be able to go on holiday again, go to celebrations and see Harry Styles (?) remained. We could wait to do those things that make us happy again, we shelved our happiness.

But what if we analyse happiness from the other direction. That happiness comes from within.

Remember the cross section of the earth. Roughly explained and starting from the inside, there is the solid inner core, then the molten outer core, a thick layer of mantle and then the thin earth’s crust.

What if we approached happiness by focusing on our powerful deep inner core, by focusing on;

  • Who we are

  • How we want to be

  • What we want to achieve

  • Why we want to keep growing

Rather than giving all our attention to the earth’s crust/surface happiness that is so fleeting and susceptible to disruption.

We have been programmed that happiness comes to us. When we have that perfect job. When the kids are doing well at school. When all the washing and ironing is done. When we have that perfect weekend away. Those external things are the things that make us happy.

But do they?

Isn’t a greater happiness one that comes from within. One that doesn’t depend on having that illusive “comfortable” life. Or getting that promotion. Or finally having that once in a lifetime holiday finally booked. Or seeing Harry Styles live (!!!!!!!).

I’m talking about inner work here. Inner work to awaken your inner core of who and how you are. Inner work to start to reveal a truer, more stable and more sustainable source of happiness.

That’s amazing Alexa! I’m in. I love your concept. I’m sold. So how do I do that?

Well this is the exciting part. I don’t know. But I do know that this is where I want my energy to go from now on. So my first steps are to learn more about myself now. And to listen to what I need and want and to try and learn and apply those learnings.

How am I doing that? For me podcasts, audiobooks and conversations with friends have been more starting points in terms of my learning. I’ve been trying to apply my learnings by meditating more, by speaking to myself as a dear friend rather than an annoying colleague and saying no to things and people that I know are not what my inner core needs.

I am at the beginning of this particular journey. And I would love for you to join me and walk with me on your own happiness journey. After all, inspiring and guiding others is also part of my inner core happiness.

I share this with only the hope that it has stirred something inside you to encourage you to start seeing happiness from a different perspective, that doesn’t come from outside in. Because happiness is inside out.


If you are interested in learning more about how to encourage personal growth, follow me on Instagram, Facebook and LinkedIn.

And finally, if you are interested in learning more about my 1:1 GROW, ARRIVE and RISE coaching packages, hit reply or send an email to with the subject line "Tell me more please" to receive information on how they could help you to create more clarity, take more action and have more sustainable change in your life, work and relationships.

5 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All
bottom of page